Hmm Something Is Different

I found myself looking forward for the mail to be delivered everyday...a chance there might be a letter from my buddy. I use to write him every couple of weeks..no big deal. Now I was writing him every few days. I couldn't get enough of him. I wanted to learn as much about him as possible. He was so open. It didn't take long for us to see how much we thought alike and believe it or not had in common! It was amazing to say the least. I knew everything I was feeling was wrong. How could something that felt so right be so wrong? I couldn't stop thinking about him! I prayed to God for guidance, I didn't know what to do. I hadn't felt so alive in over 15 years! I had to go with what felt right. I had to take a chance.... Now the problem was how do I tell him how I was feeling? I had been playing it off so cool or so I thought! So my next letter started a little different.... I told him how much he warmed my heart, how much I cared about him.  I was falling in love with him! How could this be possible? Everyone knows the games inmates play..they have nothing but time and nothing to lose! How was I to know if I was just a game he was playing? I had so many doubts! I was surprised to learn he was feeling something too. He kept reassuring me he was for real and not playing with my heart. Before I went any further I had to make sure I was ready for the backlash and anger I would be facing from my kids. I didn't want to toy with his heart either. I was about to make a decision that would change my life as I knew it! I have lived for my kids for the last 21 years. They are grown up and moving on. It's time I do the same! I deserve to be happy. I want to love someone with all my heart and know I am loved in return. I wanted nothing more then to give my love and my heart to Justin. It felt so right!